Couples Therapy

deeper emotional connection for love that lasts

When was the last time you felt close and connected?

You’re feeling the distance between you grow further and further. You’re longing to feel important to each other again, but not sure how to reach — or if they’ll be receptive or reach back. You might even be wondering if it’s possible to get your needs met in this relationship at all.

If you feel like you’re stuck in an endless cycle of pointless arguments that never go anywhere, if you’re avoiding each other to avoid those arguments, or if you’ve experienced a betrayal that has shaken the foundation of your life together…It’s time to try something new.

Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples (EFCT) can help.

Using research-supported therapeutic techniques, I can help you identify the communication patterns keeping you stuck. We can find out what's driving each of you when things get derailed, and give you the tools you need to get back on track with each other. In couples therapy, you’ll gain more access to your tender feelings and practice reaching to each other in new ways. We’ll replace the old patterns with a new one that actually works for you both.

We can make your relationship a place of safety, connection, hope, and healing.

We can help your relationship become a haven that gives you strength when the world around you seems to be falling apart.

We can address the parts that feel broken and make these parts stronger than ever.

What’s been challenging in your partnership? I often see couples struggling with:

  • Communication issues

  • Conflict

  • Infidelity/betrayal recovery

  • Sexual intimacy issues

  • Effects of traumatic experience

  • Neurotype differences between partners

  • Parenting disagreements

  • Military service/lifestyle stress

What is the process of EFT couples therapy?

  • Foundations & Assessment

    Our first meeting will be with both of you so I can hear your history together. Next I’ll meet with each of you one-on-one to learn more about you individually: your family experiences, your perspective on couple issues, and any other data that might be relevant as I work on your relationship’s behalf.

  • Stage 1: De-Escalation

    De-Escalation is about the three of us collaborating to understand the negative patterns you’re caught in, each of your positions in the pattern, and what emotions are driving each of your positions. We’ll start with more cognitive discussions then shift to accessing more of the underlying emotion. The more realness you can bring, the better!

  • Stage 2: Re-Engagement

    Here’s when you’ll each get more practice in accessing your vulnerable emotions and reaching to each other with clear communication. We’ll begin to re-shape the interactions so there’s more connection — and that connection happens on a deeper level. If your relationship has experienced wounds or betrayal, this is where we’ll start to heal what feels broken.

  • Stage 3: Consolidation

    By this time, you’ll need less and less help from me. The focus shifts to exploration of older problems and your stronger connection will offer new solutions. You may still find yourselves missing each other sometimes (which is normal for relationships!) but you have more confidence in coming back together - and it happens more quickly and with more ease than ever before.

Unsure if I’m the one for you two?

You deserve to feel understood and supported by your couples therapist.

Let’s decide together if I’m a fit for BOTH of you!

 
Schedule your free consultation